Write You Bastard!
Ok, so I have this domain here, ya see, but now I'm left needing/wanting to do something with it. Creativity is not my greatest strength, so spewing random bits of words formulated by my tired brain cells seems to be the only logical thing left for me to do (as opposed to something really novel). You, the lovely reader, are the poor soul who is left to read it...or not, considering you could easily go somewhere else if you really wanted to.
Good, you are still here. Now, when I last had a web site at this domain, my whole schtick was my pointless rambling (although some people just liked the web cam...when I say some people, I mean five...when I say five, I mean one, 44 year-old, gay man in Ohio who still lived in his mom's basement). That ADD-like approach to writing is soooooooo 1999, though. I need to do something a little more ambitious this time around (pretentious, much?).
I need to create something meaningful, not necessarily meaningful for anyone else, but meaningful for me. I need to craft arguments. I need to create stories and characters. I need to observe the world and use my limited vocabulary to describe it so that 30 years from now, I can read my words and say, "Damn, you really were a boring guy." No, wait, I want to say, "Wow, I don't even remember what 'rutilant' even means now!" Err. That's not right either. Frankly, I don't know what I want, but last weekend, I felt an overwhelming desire to pour myself into something that was for me instead of a company or a movement or the voices in my head (selfish bastards, those voices).
This probably all stems from the uncertainty of being in my mid-twenties with only the vaguest of ideas as to where my life is headed. There is still time for me to drop out of society and become a monk or a recluse, I suppose. Recluses are still allowed Internet access and masturbation, so that takes being a monk out of the realm of possibility (that was an easy choice). I don't have to be a recluse though! There is still time for me to change the world or find a niche or at least take up an interesting hobby. Changing the world would be fun though. Making a positive change would be the best scenario, obviously, but in a pinch I suppose I could leave a lasting scar on the planet and be okay with it.
Damnit, I'm rambling again. Well, maybe for right now I'll just stick with what I know. Writers write, right? So writing pointless garbage may actually unlock the stories and ideas that I hope and pray are stuck inside this bowl of jelly known as my brain. Then again, I could actually be a boring, uninspired, computer geek. Pshaw! The only time I'm wasting here is my own, so what do I have to lose?
Posted by Mr. Eff on 08/22/2003